Return to The Humor Index.
InterWeavers.
"Does Your Chewing Gum Lose Its Flavor On the Bedpost Overnight?"
"Don't Cry On My Shoulders Cause Your Rustin' My Spurs"
"Drop-kick me, Jesus, through the Goal posts of Life."
"Here's a Quarter, Call Someone Who Cares."
"How Can I Miss You If You Won't Go Away?"
"How Can You Believe Me When I Say I Love You When You Know I've Been A Liar All My Life?"
"I Been Roped and Throwed by Jesus in the Holy Ghost Corral."
"I Can't Love Your Body if Your Heart's Not In It"
"I Don't Know Whether to Kill Myself or Go Bowling."
"I Fell In A Pile Of You, And Got Love All Over Me"
"I Flushed You From The Toilets Of My Heart."
"I Meant Every Word That He Said"
"I Would Have Writ You A Letter, But I Couldn't Spell Yecch!"
"I Wouldn't Take Her To A Dawg Fight, Cause I'm Afraid She'd Win"
"I'd Rather Have a Bottle in Front of Me than a Frontal Lobotomy."
"I'm Gonna Hire a Wino to Decorate our Home."
"I'm Just A Bug On The WIndshield of Life."
"I'm So Miserable Without You, It's Like Having You Here"
"I've Got Four On the Floor and a Fifth Under The Seat"
"I've Got Tears in My Ears From Lying on My Back in My Bed 'n' Cryin' Over You."
"If I Can't Be Number One In Your Life, Then Number Two On You"
"If It's Got To Be Later, How 'Bout Later Tonight?"
"If Love Were Oil, I'd Be A Quart Low"
"If You Don't Leave Me Alone, I'll Go And Find Someone Else Who Will"
"Learning to Live Again is Killing Me."
"May The Bird of Paradise Fly Up Your Nose"
"My Every Day Silver Is Plastic"
"I Wanna Whip Your Cow"
"My Head Hurts, My Feet Stink, and I Don't Love Jesus"
"My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend, And I Sure Do Miss Him"
"Oh, I've Got Hair Oil on My Ears, and My Glasses are Slipping Down, but Baby I Can See Through You."
"Oh, Lord! It's Hard to be Humble When You're Perfect in Every Way"
"Please Bypass This Heart"
"She's Got Freckles On Her, But She's Pretty"
"She's Out Doing What I'm Here Doing Without."
"If I Said You Had A Beautiful Body, Would You Hold It Against Me?"
"Thank God and Greyhound She's Gone"
"They May Put me in Prison, but They Can't Stop My Face from Breakin' Out."
"When the Phone Don't Ring, Baby, you'll Know it's me."
"You Can't Deal Me All the Aces and Expect Me Not to Play."
"You Can't Roller Skate in a Buffalo Herd"
"You Done Tore Out My Heart and Stomped That Sucker Flat."
"You're Ruining my Bad Reputation."
"You're The Reason Our Baby's So Ugly"
"I'll Get Over You, as Soon as You Get Out From Under Him"
"I Wish I Were In Dixie Tonight, But She's Out of Town."
"It Takes Me All Night Long To Do, What I Used To Do, All Night Long"
"She Got the Gold Mine, and I Got the Shaft"
"She Got the Ring, I Got the Finger."
"Swing Wide Your Gate of Love"
"There Ain't No Waste in My Baby's Love Canal"
"If She Puts Lipstick On My Dipstick, I'll Fall In Love"
"I Hate Every Bone In Your Body Except Mine"